MID-WEEK MUSINGS AND EARLY LOOKS AT CFB INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITIES

“I have a high art, I hurt with cruelty those who would damage me.” –

-Saturday Nite  Lights, 2006 A.D.

 Not a ton of news today-Gville remains peculiarly quite on the eve of homecoming, but SNL suspects things will be picking up soon.  In any event, there remains a strong belief that Florida will route UK, both in Gville and Vegas, where the oddsmakers have installed Florida as 24.5-point favorites.

Speaking of things amoral, vacuous, and otherwise irredeemable, SNL’s investment recommendations last week faired only slightly better than the investment houses that bet heavily on subprime mortgages.  Not to worry, SNL will simply ask the feds to bail him out, its the American Way!

With an ATS record of .500, SNL has been dubbed “Even Stephen” by the grinning local Vig.  The reason for the grinning, naturally, is because .500 means “juice” in Vegas parlance, or 10% to the unemployed eye-talian SNL “invests” with.  Like the executives at Lehman, SNL plans on resurfacing this week at an investment firm near you with renewed (but unsubstantiated) belief that he will soon be shopping for Rolexes courtesy of Vegas….

Early Leans….

Auburn v. WVU (-3):  Auburn, recently defrocked by the voters, visits one of the four “redneck cradles of civilization” for a Thursday night game.  Auburn’s defense is still solid and irrational though it may be, the SEC “don’t take kindly to strangers.”  Ask Obama, who was pulled over in MS for a broken taillight.  Leaning towards a spirited Auburn group here.

Boston College at UNC (-3):  Starting to believe that BC is Top-25 material.  Good defense, decent QB, and student fan base every bit as drunk and stupid as your regular student fan base, with one-third less attractive girls.  UNC injuries should help.

Texas Tech (+2) at Kansas:  There must be millions of clever ways to dispel the fatuous notion that TT is a top-10 team.  SNL can’t think of any, so an ass-kicking by Kansas will have to do. 

Okie State v. UT (-13):  Doesn’t the law of averages mandate that someone cover the spread against UT?  Why not Okie State, they are, after all, coached by a man, who is over 40.  In waht must be characterized as the very embodiment of “gambling,” leaning towards the Cowboys. 

Georgia v. LSU:  This game is more notable for the quandary it presents Gator backers with than anything else.  Georgia win sends Gameday to Jax and likely gets the Gators attention.  An LSU win helps SOS but likely makes Georgia a sizeable underdog next week.  That said Georgia pisses SNL off.  Knowshon, Stafford, and Green are all elite players, but Georgia can’t put anyone away and LSU is still a bellicose group-especially after being emasculated in Gainesville.  SNL likes the short number here for the Tigers.

Colorado (+21.5) at Mizzou:  Lotta points for a dispirited group collecting the pieces of their shattered ambitions.  Hmmm…..

Elsewhere…

The BCS computers like the SEC…SNL, much to the chagrin of his scientist father, will not bore you with the crushingly oppressive  mathematics, but the suffice it to say that the computers have the SEC ranked lightly ahead of the Big 12 at this point.  Here’s the “BCS Computers for Dummies” version…

The “z-score” is a composite of the 6  computers used to rank the conferences as a whole.  The computers exist inedependent of one another and use largely the same criteria albeit with different weights assigned to certain variables. 

The average of these 6 z-scores is:

SEC: 1.138
Big 12: 1.127
ACC: 0.804
Big 10: 0.776

Big East: 0.328
PAC 10: 0.277
MWC: 0.122

WAC: -0.605

MAC: -1.127
C-USA: -1.235
Sun Belt: -1.605

One would think that even the most rudimentary of computers would have the MWC above the PAC-10 by virtue of the fact that the MWC is 5-0 v. the PAC-10.  Just be happy SEC is where it should be, #1.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd