Degenerate Gamblers

Before getting into an overly in-depth diatribe about why Gator fans should relax and stop worrying about Alabama (who is not on Florida’s schedule when last SNL checked), we at SNL would like to remind you that we were 4-0 last week ATS.  Naturally, we hid our boyish glee when visiting Vinnie and the boys in the back of Sal’s yesterday to collect our dough, but that’s because we’re scared of him, and not you (except for the ‘Bama fan who has been threatening to kill SNL and his family for the last couple of weeks). 

Moving on…the spin-doctors have been overtime since Florida’s narrow win as if the Arkansas game existed in a vacuum and is therefore the sole piece of relevant evidence available to predict how Florida’s season will end.  For most of the national heads (and some local), Florida’s bloody demise will occur at the hands of the Birmingham shock troops led by Nick Saban, which seems reasonable based on the available resume of both teams to date.  The more pedestrian analysts have trumpeted this mundane argument with little more than a ”scoreboard” thesis, noting that ‘Bama drummed Arkansas by 28 whereas Florida escaped with a 3-point win.  We here at SNL find this juvenile attempt to employ the transitive properties of victories and losses to be entertaining in the way that circus monkeys are entertaining, funny for a minute or two, but lacking the depth needed to keep asses in the seats. 

The smaller-and arguably less well-reasoned-camp maintains that Florida’s come from behind victory over the is signature win that St. Tim of Tebow needed to re-focus this team, the one shining moment we will all look back on when Florida hoists the BCS trophy for the second time in a row and third time in four years this January.   The logic of this argument too lacks any real presumptive force, and not just because it is largely espoused by ex-Gator players on local airwaves-most of whom peaked vocationally when they were gifted….errr…..”earned” their physical education degree from UF, but because the “miracle” win can more easily be construed as an indictment of Florida’s offense and defense.  The offensive woes are tolerable and all, SNL included, unapologetically believed before last Saturday that as long as St. Tebow and Pope Urban remained breathing, the offense would round into form at some point.  The defense was another story, it was our heart, where we Gators pointed when opposing fan bases derided this year’s team.  This is a little harder to do after the hyped Gator D gave up 188 yards in 3 possessions after taking a 13-10 lead last Saturday.  As above, Florida was missing some bodies on the line, but this year’s D continues tro be a very-good-but-far-from-dominant unit.  This is primarily due to the difficulty Florida has had with power runners fielded by Arkansas and Tennessee, which makes Ingram seem more frightening than Vinnie, but only slightly. 

The truth, as SNL told you on Saturday, was that Arkansas is much improved since their beatdown at ‘Bama, and Florida was lacking bodies on the D-Line and largely unfocused after winning a nationally telecasted game in Baton Rouge against a top-10 opponent.  It is therefore ridiculous to suggest that this year’s version of the Gators cannot, under any circumstances, beat ‘Bama.  Should Florida be favored over ‘Bama if the game was played this week?  Probably not.  Thankfully, we don’t have to worry about that yet. 

Dis and Dat…The Noles take their low-flying circus on the road to visit former Warden of Da’ U,  Butch Davis.  We haven’t capped this game yet, but we plant to.  Layla Kiffin’s effeminate hubby is still taking shots at Meyer, though their getting slightly more veiled.  This time, Layla’s boy-toy has gone out of his way to tell all within earshot that ‘Bama is clearly better than Florida.  Presumably, this assertion comes from Kiffin’s review of film?  Irrespective, Kiffin is still the crown-prince of a losing program and better still, Florida fans can openly root for ‘Bama to crush Kiffin’s Vols this week, since the Gators will get their shot at the Tide later.  And, Colin Cowherd, one of E-SPIN’s better radio personalities, just opined that the refs gave Florida the win last week.   Based on time remaining, down and distance, and other objective factors-like Tebow on the field-this opsition seems a little off-base, but keep winning and no one will remember either way.  Terrelle Pryor is taking heat from the Buckeye fan bas and quite frankly, looking more and more like an NFL receiver…

Next…Thursday’s pick and Layla Kiffin’s Husband’s dream come true, a scathing rebuke of his continued “ass-ness” by a blooger-this blogger in fact.   

-So Sayeth the Shepherd