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halloween-football.jpg Halloween football image by jazyjc We’ll get to Forida-UGA, but mindful of the need to get our investments called in to the local vig before noon EST, we’re all business this a.m. 

Housekeeping…like so many tattooed girls we’ve met in pool halls over the years, WVU excited us under cover of darkness only to disappoint when the lights came on.  In a related story, we’ve noted that this year more than last, even the most marginally compelling of matchups has seemed to find its way to primetime television this year, which makes for a horrible noon slate for watching and more importantly, gambling.  This is no doubt due in part to E-SPIN’s unholy matrimony with the SEC, and in part because the Big 11 is horrible TV rife with slow players, corpulent chicks, and teams exchanging buckets of spit and the like after every game.  So….only 2 nooners today…

Ole Miss (-5) v. Auburn:  The frosty-tipped heads at E-SPIN , when not busy sexing starry-eyed interns in Bristol to “learn” the ropes, have been lamenting the demise of Ole Miss since the Rebels went down to (that’s “to” not “on” degenerates) the OBC early this year.  Since then, Saban’s rowdy horde has plundered The Grove, which has further eroded any widespread support for Nutt and his cronies. 

Erstwhile, on the plains, Auburn’s gimmicky offense has fallen so far its advertising on Craig’s List for world series tix.  Today, Auburn can try to get their life back against the best defense in the SEC outside of Birmingham and Gainesville.  We smell R-E-L-A-P-S-E.  Ole Miss wins easy, Ole Miss -5.

Wisconsin (-7) v. Purdue:  Only 7?  Oh yeah, Purdue got lucky and beat OSU last week.  Won’t happen again.  Wizzy in a laugher.  Wisconsin -7.

GTU (-11.5) at Vandy:  Vandy, laughing stock of the SEC football fan and pride of the league’s scholastic sorts, did there best to ruin our ‘Tussin theory last week, when they covered against the OBC’s poor performing ‘Cocks.  While erratic performance is common in South Carolina, it isn’t in the ATL where GT’s flex-bone damn near always finds the right spot.  The ‘Tussin theory will be back after the Jackets hammer the ‘Dores tonight.  Back the truck up on this one.

We’ve got two more we’re eyeballing, but these should keep you busy while we talk to our sources on the ground. 

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: ACC, ATS, Bama, Degenerate Gambler, Degenerate Gamblers, SEC

Ark

No one likes a braggart, but SNL is moving squarely into the realm Nostradamus, 2-0 so far and up 31-points (ATS) with Arkansas.  Posted ad nauseum about this game earlier in the week, and with Spikes out, this game is going down to the wire.  Look for ‘Bama to struggle too, so Meyer just needs to win and move on. 

Elsewhere, the Buckeyes go down to Purdue as 2-touchdown road favorites, Oklahoma loses in a tough way, and USC is on its way to snuffing out Notre Dame’s last gasp for respectability.  A collective “phew” can be heard if you listen carefully.  We’ll be back, but hope the flock is enjoying the returns on equity.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

  SNL would like to begin by noting that the majority of his peers, in typical fashion, have moved past Florida’s dominating win over Alabama and are now scouting Oklahoma while making reservations in Miami on their Blackberry.  Sad, but true.  SNL’s attempts to stave off this laconic approach to Saturday’s game with the top-ranked team in the Country have been unavailing. 

More on that later.  Right now, SNL would like to revisit the “Speed v. Power” lexicon as it relates to tomorrow’s game, which has been embedded in the collective psyche of the print media since this matchup became a possibility.

The “thesis” of this post can be summed up as follows:  Florida’s so-called “spread” offense is deceiving and Florida  is every bit the power team that ‘Bama purports to be. 

To explore this contention, there must be a baseline by which the term “power team” is defined.  For SNL’s purposes, a power team is loosely defined as a run-oriented team which emphasizes ball control and field position with a dominant run game and a commensurately dominant defensive front 7.  A power team also excels in the red zone on both sides of the ball.

Using this loose definition as a baseline confirms that Florida is every bit the power-team that ‘Bama is albeit with faster players at the skill positions.  Those who contend otherwise seek support in the flimsiest of ways, which is by comparing and contrasting the base sets of the respective offenses; ‘Bama in the traditional power-I and Florida in the shotgun with receivers and backs all over the place.  The statistics, however, reveal how thin the veneer of this wooden contention is.

CATEGORY

TEAM A

TEAM B

Rush Offense

237 ypg

201 ypg

Yards Per Carry

6.2

4.82

Carries

459

502

Pass Efficiency Offense

#5

#52

Interception Percentage (per 100 attempts)

1.08%

2.15%

Red Zone offense

#9

#51

Red Zone Defense

#5

#58

Sacks allowed

#15

#21

3rd Down Conversion Defense

#15

#1

Sacks

2.5 per game

1.9 per game

Rushing TD’s

40

30

Percentage of plays run/pass

62.4%/37.6%

64.2%/35.8%

Team A, of course, is UF and Team B is ‘Bama.  For comparative purposes, it is useful to note that the foregoing chart is limited to statistics with relevance to the Power v. Speed argument.  There are more compelling statistics that lack overall relevance to this argument-such as total offense (UF #17/’Bama #53), Scoring Offense (UF #3/’Bama #28) and passing offense (UF #61/’Bama #97)-which generally favor UF.  

Irrespective, the conclusion to be drawn is that UF is a power running team which uses unconventional (at least by Bear Bryant standards) means to achieve this moniker.  Though lacking an Adre Smith or Antoine Caldwell, UF’s offensive line is deep, powerful, and more than capable of slugging it out with Cody & Co.  Likewise, UF’s defense is a unit capable of playing gap control against ‘Bama’s behemoths, which will force Parker-Wilson to take to the air early and often.

That said this is not a game to be taken lightly.  Saban is the coaching equivalent of a Sith Lord and will have his team amply prepared for this game.  Saban and his Visigoth hordes should be further motivated by the national media’s love of Florida and the 10-point spread assigned this game by the Vegas degenerates. 

So, while Florida may well prevail, this game will cause some angst amongst the Gator faithful and should end up very close to the Vegas number, let’s say Florida 33, ‘Bama 24.  See ya’ in South Beach playas’!

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: BCS, Darth Saban, Pope Meyer, SEC

An Alabama Redneck Says, Hell, Even I Voted For OBama

No time to post-but thought this might fire some of you up-its from bamanation.net. 

As ‘Bama belacosity goes, this is fairly typical stuff:  You know, we (‘Bama) were great back in the day, UF is the new “Miami”, we (‘Bama) are bona fide (hillbillies deem themselve to be sophisticates when they employ this term) football royalty whereas UF is the football equivalent of the carpetbagging yankees who came to the south with their fancy books and automobiles and ruined what was once a proudly ignorant culture. 

To be fair, SNL has defended lawsuits in Alabama and rest assured, outside of Birmingham, it is a godforsaken, broke, trash-filled (literally and figuratively), uneducated, and corpulent (this means “fat” ‘Bama fan) state with nothing going for it outside of its flagship football programs.  To their credit, Alabamians have embraced their lack of mental dexterity by proudly clinging to the images and events that once made this state great-such as the rebel flag, killing animals (and each other) under the influence of alcohol,  deep-seeded dislike of all non-whites, non-baptists (though pentacostals are occasionally accepted), literature, art, and race minglin’, and love of cigarettes, crystal meth, Mountain Dew (Code Red if ya’ got it!), fried food, Country Music, lift kits, and teenage pregnancy. The result is some sort of delusional catharsis that is inexplicable to anyone who has traveled…well, anywhere.

Seriously, to dub this state a cultural vacuum is a disservice to vacuums, which are for more useful, clever, and relevant in “America proper” than Alabama will ever be.  On the bright side, Mississippi makes Alabama look like Paris-its all relative I suppose.  Enjoy.

There’s been many big SEC Championship games since the Title showdown’s inception back in 1992; heck playing for a conference title is always big. But for the SEC, there may not be one greater than this year’s. Number 1 vs. Number 2 for the SEC, and a spot in the National Title Game.

For me though, there’s much more at stake. Many Bama Fans have a top hated team that has our supreme wrath in some form or another. Some Bama Fans hate Auburn the most, others despise Tennessee. There are some Bama Fans who might have their top enemies as LSU, Georgia; or might take their hate outside the conference to a team like Notre Dame. For me, it’s the Gators. I was born and raised in Jacksonville, Florida in the middle of the inner-city; 3 miles from the fabled “Gator Bowl” and 60 miles from the Campus of UF itself. To say I was born in Gator Country is an understatement; and obviously not my choice. (Frankly if the good Lord had asked me I would have told him to send my Momma to a Bama Game and let me be born at Halftime in Bryant-Denny.)

The Crimson Tide stuck to me like glue at an early age. Bama had a quick and decisive advantage in gaining my love for them-family tradition. My Grandfather, Jake Redden and My Great-Grandfather, John Guy Redden, were the first Father-Son combination at Alabama. Dating back to 1858, I’ve had 5 generations in my family attend UA. It was an easy sell-and one I would have made even if I was not born into the great family I was.

Unfortunately, the endless flock of Orange and Blue clad idiots around me never thought my family’s background or rich tradition in college football was all that great-which shouldn’t surprise anyone considering that Florida’s tradition before the arrival of Spurrier before 1990 centered around NCAA probation and years of mediocre at best seasons. We’re polar opposites, us and Florida. Bama, the old power, built on hard work, dedication and southern pride; and the Gators, the Johnny-come-lately fad team, complete with trash talking players and coaches, and the most obnoxious fan based in the world.

I got a taste of the Gators’ superb handling of relationships with fans of other teams early and often. At 5 years old, when Bama was about to play Penn State for the National Title, I was taken to see Santa Claus as I had been the year before, as always proudly wearing my Bama Hat and Jacket. After extolling my list of wants to this curiously bored looking Santa, he asked me, “Are you done? Because I can tell you that little boys and girls who are Bama Fans don’t get presents from me; only little Gator fans get presents.” (I did reply to him though, “If you hate Bama so much, then why do you wear their colors?”) It didn’t stop there-growing up all the way through high school, there was constant cracks-not ribbing-but vile, degrading comments from not only other children and later other teens, but adults too. In 1992 after returning back from the SEC Championship, my 80 year old grandparents and I received a horrible shock when we saw a Gator Car Flag had been thrown through our front window of our house. A year later after returning from the 93 game, my best friend, who was visiting me from Anniston, had his car turned over and spray painted Orange and Blue. I could go on for a while, but I imagine you get my gist. Those people disgust me to no end, and I quickly got out of that area and state as fast as I could.

I still hear from some of my former class mates who have the address to my myspace page and are more than happy to harp on their success and how much better the Gators are than the Tide. I won’t check it anytime soon, but I guarantee my inbox will be quite full by the end of the week.

When the Miami Dynasty began to wane in the mid-90’s, the Gators took over as the thug team of the NCAA. And like the Hurricanes of old, the Gators seek to psychologically beat you before the game with their “Mystique” and perceived invincibility. Bama proved on a fateful night back in January of 1993 how you deal with a thug-punch them in the mouth. And that’s what we have to do Saturday night. A team that feels it needs to beat you with a psychological edge instead of talent hides something-I personally believe that whatever the Gators are hiding, Ole Miss found it out. And Bama will too. And Saturday night, we can all sit back and smile, with fond memories of a similar set of circumstances that we found ourselves in 1992.

Tags: Bama, BCS, Meyer, Saban

 Apologies to all for the intermittent posting of late.  Travel, child, wisby, and family have been demanding.  On with the show…

Fresh off beatdowns of their hated rivals, Bama, Florida, and their zealous constituencies can now legitimately focus on one another.  The first, and most predictable, framing of this week’s game by the pundits and fans is ‘Bama’s power v. Florida’s speed. 

For those prone to believe that all shiny things are valuable, or that a rear-spoiler makes a cheap American sedan fast, the power v. speed paradigm seems to fit.  After all, Bama is anchored along the lines of scrimmage by 2 behemoths, Cody (DT) and Smith (OT)-both first round certanties in the upcoming draft. 

‘Bama also works largely from the I-formation, which is the traditional set for the “run-first” power teams, and uses the run to set-up its play action passing game.

Florida, conversely, lines up all over the field with speedy little (by football standards) fellows, most of whom do or could run track in the offseason.  Florida also throws the ball a great deal-or more accurately, looks like its going to throw a great deal-and has only 1 player recognized nationally (Spikes) on its defense. 

At first blush, therefore,the Power v. Speed characterization seems to fit.  As is often the case, however, the initial diagnosis misses the mark.  The more well-reasoned framing of this game is ‘Bama’s Power v. Florida’s Power and Speed.

To be continued…

Tags: BCS, Meyer, Saban, SEC

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