UGA

You are currently browsing the archive for the UGA category.

For those members of the flock that are hard-of-thinking, the foregoing picture is a metaphor for last Saturday’s “showdowns,” which turned out to be beatdowns, but provided the home teams fan base with a great chance to drink excessively. 

SNL recently posted on the “Flori-Bama”.  This quasi-clever moniker (which is also the name of a world famous bar on the state line) is SNL’s way of saying that Florida and Alabama are equal but opposite reciprocals of one another, and on a collision course for ATL and in turn, the BCSNCG. 

For the most part, the similarities were obvious before last week, when both Alabama and Florida shut down top-20 teams on the road in the most pugilistic of ways, stifling defenses and plodding, conservative offenses with a run-first philosophy.  Sure there are other similarities; both programs are helmed by taciturn, tight-lipped, control freaks who lord over their respective programs (and states for that matter) like medieval warlords and both fan bases are beyond fervent.  For the most erudite Florida fans, the fact that the Gators under Pope Meyer are a single-wing, power running team (and have been for awhile now) that is thinly camouflaged by offensive sets with wide receivers running thither and yon, is not only no surprise, but is welcomed. 

For many, however, this concept is upsetting.  This is particularly true amongst those who still recall with giddy reverie the days when the OBC would fill the air with footballs.  Be that as it may, SNL has accepted if nt embraced the fact that Meyer’s Gators are and will likely remain a team created in ‘Bama’s image-which is a good thing.  And, when these titans meet in the ATL this year, the collision will be epic-though the scoreboard may not reflect the genius of the respective generals on each sideline. 

SNL’s prescience has lost some of its shine now that the mainstream heads at si.com and E-SPIN have jumped on the bandwagon, but we will continue to site to our previous post as evidence that we were way out in front of this story. 

Well, flock, the parallels between the SEC behemoths continues this week when Alabama hosts USC and Florida hosts Arkansas.  For the records, Vegas has made ‘Bama a mere 17-point favorite over USC, and Florida a whopping 24-point favorite over the Hawgs.  The camps of both underdogs are predictably mum on the chances for an upset, and who can blame them.  More on the actual matchups later, let’s do some housekeeping. 

Last week, 7-4 ATS, 18-13 YTD.  By now, most teams are who we thought they were, and the wins are starting to come at a pace which will have the wifey in some new jewelry at season’s end.  SNL’s winning percentage in year’s past has been roughly 57% in weeks 1 through 5, and 67% in weeks 5 through 14.  Se we expect to keep on rolling.

Dis and Dat….The wheels remain intact in Athens, but barely.  Too bad because even the most calloused Gator fan can see that Richt is a good Coach and a better person.  Still, the fratricide of the SEC is unrelenting and losing to Layla Kiffin’s husband will fire up any fan base because, well, that guy’s a total jackass.  Speaking of wheels, another tough week for the ‘Noles, losing at home to Tech having been compounded by the details of the cheating schedule.  Far be it for SNL to pile on, but if you’re going to give scholarships to players who read a second-grade level (after a few years of “college” no less), you should have the common decency to be a good football team.  On the upside, by virtue of consistently sucking for 5-years or so, no one is saying that the “wheels are coming off” in Tallahassee, that ship has sailed. 

Erstwhile…Da’ U will be without 4 starters when it visits UCF tomorrow, which won’t matter, and USFwas rolled at home by Cincinnati, a fact which is further illustrative of FSU’s precipitous fall from grace since, you know, the Bulls crushed the ‘Noles in Doak with a Backup QB a few weeks back.  Finally, this is a grand week for all of CFB.  Why?  Because Notre Damehas to play USC, which will effectively foreclose any more talk of the Clausen-for-heisman, a loss for the limousine industry, but a win for Irish-haters everywhere.  The downside, of course, is the inevitable “USC is playing as well as anyone in the country right now,”  which will be a talking point for all of the frosted tipped fellows at E-SPIN. 

Picks out tomorrow…

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: ATS, Degenerate Gambler, DEGENERATES, Layla Kiffin, Noles, PAC 1+9, SEC, Spurrier, The Hat, UGA, Urban Meyer, USC

A flock member recently asked SNL “who his blog was intended for.”  This innocuous query came after reviewing a particularly profane comment from an aggrieved felon..errr…fan of Da’ U.  Naturally, the comment was replete with typos and misspellings-even the dirty words-so the authenticity of the fan’s allegiance was not in doubt (sorry, Chet, it’s the other fans of Da’ U that SNL is dissing).  I managed to track the guy down using his e-mail and found him on Twittter.  His “tweeting” mugshot revealed that he had frosted tips, which is the genesis of this post.

So, after some rumination, SNL has come up with some general rules to determine who this blog is NOT intended for:

1.  Men with frosted tips-sorry Beau, Lance or whatever your name may be.  Frosting your tips is an automatic bar to societal acceptance, even if it does score points with drunk sorority floozies.  This guy below got his tips frosted as a Valentine’s day present for his girlfriend-allegedly.  Seriously, frosted tips warrant an a**-kicking on principal.

  2.  “I-post-mopey-messages-on-Facebook” Guy-this kills me.  Seriously, who in the hell cares if you’re depressed, or “having the worst day of your pathetic life”?  Publicly emoting via the internet is beyond any bounds of manhood.  You’re so pathetic Frosted-tip-guy could kick your ass and you’re not welcome here.

3.  “Rides-behind-his-roomie-on-Scooter” guy-See above and look out for Frosty, who could whip your ass too.  Seriously, dude on dude + a scooter?  What does this say about you (not that there’s anything wrong with it)?

4.  “Uses-fender-bender-insurance-money-for-an-Xbox” guy.  This guy really pisses me off because, in the words of Dean Wormser, “[f]at, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life.”  Also, I invariably find myself behind this guy in traffic and he’s using hand signals and has a Graafix sticker on his windshield, which is infuriating for no reason other than the fact that it is..  

There are some others that time prevents me from expounding on, such as wallet-chained-to-pants-guy, which cracks me up because we all know that this security precaution/fashion statement, which is usually compolimented by a pony tail and a leather vest essentially guarantees that you don’t have a damn thing in that wallet that anyone wants.  

Moving along…

Cruising last night on my unofficial pcik only to watch G. Tech choke up a 24-point lead and then add further insult by pulling out the victory.  Not sure what this game said about either club in the larger picture, but the Jackets’ D-line seems to have fallen off a bit.  Spiller should have went to Florida, where he’d be a Heisman and 2 NC’s up on his current position as “really-fast-dude-0n-crappy-team.” 

The Picks:

USC (+7) at UGA:  Word in Athens is that there’s significant angst over Cox and that the freshman back-up, who’s an “athletic” QB, could see significant playing time.  In addition, UGA’s schedule is murderous, so the pressure to win is monumental.  Erstwhile, in Carolina, the OBC is ripping off his one-liners, like “[w]ell, we won, so we’re not as bad off as the teams that lost.”  Hardly bulletin board material, but still feel like the OBC can cover the generous points here. 

Freson St. (+9) at Wisonsin:  This pick is more of an indictment of Wisconsin than an endorsement of Fresno.  Seriously, Wisconsin stinks and the girls that reside there are largely corpulent, which is further reason for SNL’s disdain.   The more adventurous among you may want to allocate some funds to the moneyline here.

UT (-9.5) v. UCLA:  The flock knows that SNL hates the baby bears and their smug Coach.  He also hates some Vols and their smug Coach.  But money always trumps hatred, and SNL likes this Vols club-alot.  The cupboard was stocked when Kiifin rolled in and his staff is phenomenal, as is his wife.  Vols in a rout. 

That’s all folks….2-1 on the year and looking to take the wife on a cruise in November, courtesy of Vinnie.

Coming Soon…

The Legend of Tebow…

LSU’s woes…

Touchdown Jesus’ Resurrection…

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

 

 

Tags: ACC, ATS, Da' U, Degenerate Gambler, PAC 1+9, Vols

Georgia (+5.5/61u) at Okie St.:  The more I look at this game, the more I like it.  UGA seems to have more talent on both lines of scrimmage, and more overall speed.  In addition, there’s some value here because this year’s UGA is (ostensibly)O a pedestrian outfit while Okie St. is everyone’s “dark horse” in the Big 12.  Not sure of UGA has the firepower to win this on outright, but like getting the 5.5 with a dog that can win outright. 

Wake Forest (-2) v. Baylor:  Like Skinner & Co. laying the small number against another team coveted by the E-SPIN heads.  Wake always plays well at home and has a tendency to under-promise and over-deliver as they did when Ole Miss came to town last year.  Still, can’t help but feel the ACC is the AIG of the CFB world, and Baylor is, well, a nice small-cap.  Take the points with confidence. 

Tennesseelooks alot like the kid you beat up on the last day of school who went home and juiced all summer for the sole purpose of kicking your ass in the fall.  Crompton is crisp, the o-line is strong, and the defense is big and athletic.  Kiffin is using alot of sets with a power running game and the offense looks like a big, ugly, orange version of the old Trojans.  In fact, UT looks like UT used to look every year albeit slightly more advanced. 

This really should come as no surprise as SNL posited last year that the “eyeball test” rendered UT a top-10 team.  In other words, it wasn’t talent that was lacking at UT, it was a team and administration torn by loyalty to a coach who’d done some great things, but was no longer capable of winning.  SNL will leave the reasons for UT’s demise under Fulmer to the loyalists, but suffice it to say that the Kiffin experiment looks good so far.

Is UT ready to beat Florida at The Swamp?  Probably not.  Still, UT will have a shot at a PAC-10 unit before coming to Gainesville while the Gators are digesting a D-II cupcake and a worse than expected Troy.  UT looks hungry and the Kiffin regime, which was so easy to mock during the summer, now appears to be a formidable foe.  Bryce Brown, by the bye, has a nice TD run and UT looks ready to ascend into the ranks of the SEC elite, which is a good thing for the league.  One thing’s for sure, Florida could use the SOS, but better be ready for a battle when the Vols come to town.

Bold prediction:  UT finishes with 9 wins, plays on Jan. 1, and finishes in the top 15.  The way Kiffin recruits, a the UF-UT rivalry is going to be great in the years to come.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: Kiffin, Okie St., UGA, UT, Vols

Are you kidding?

Seriously?

What is there to wish for if you’re a Florida Gator in 2009?  You’ve won 2 of the last three National Titles, boast the most recognizable and revered college football player in the last 30 years (and possibly ever), the best coach-sorry Pete, and begin the season where you left off, a near unanimous No. 1. 

The foregoing facts have fueled a cacophonous symphony of praise from the E-SPIN heads to the local talk show hosts.  Yep, the Gator Nation is fat and happy.  And, with an opening date with Charleston Southern, a 73-point underdog, there’s not much to talk about until Florida welcomes SEC newbie, Layla Kiffin’s husband to The Swamp.  Right?  Wrong. 

Florida has-and in some respects rightfully so-been suffering a quiet smear campaign as a result of its woeful non-conference schedule.  SNL knows, the SEC “grind” is second to none in the paradigm of conference strength, and this will continue to be the case in the foreseeable future.  That said the precipitous downfall of Auburn and UT, coupled with the impotence of Spurrier’s ‘Cocks (pun intended), has damaged the SEC’s Street-Cred, at least temporarily. 

So, what Florida fans should be rooting for can be distilled down to the following: 

  1. UT beats-no crushes-the Cuddly Bruins from the PAC 1+9.  While we’re at it, let’s hope the lascivious E-SPIN camera men are smart enough to fill our high-def screens with images of the giddy Jessica Simpson….errrr…I meant Layla Kiffin.
  2. FSU beats Da’U and crushes the polygamists of BYU (lucky bastards!).  Seriously, rooting against FSU is so indelibly tattooed on Gators its difficult to do, but Florida is in desperate need of the SOS.
  3. Steve Superior’s ‘Cocks prevail over the yet another cuddly group of Wolves at NCSU.  This game takes on added import as it is opening day, which means degenerate gamblers with far more money than SNL-and presumably, wives who are willing to wear shoes not made by Prada-will be boozing and wagering like sugared-up 12-year olds at a slumber party.  The conference needs a strong showing here.
  4. Saban’s Storm Troopers crush the formidable-but-painful-to-watch Hokies.  SNL knows that every Hokie slight brings him closer to death via Vinnie “Hands” Randazzo and his entourage of guinea soldiers.  Still, VT is the likely ACC champ and in today’s playoff-less world, the “X beat Y which beat Z” argument holds a lot of sway with the more feeble-minded fans (and some analysts too). 
  5. UGA beats what’s-his face at Okie StateYeah, SNL knows that the “what’s-his-face” referred to here is “A MAN!!!”, still, he’s Zooker’s cohort which in and of itself is sufficient reason to root for his demise.  Throw in the current Big 12 v. SEC rivalry, and there’s no compelling reason not to wish for a demoralizing defeat for the Cow-girls in Stillwater.   

The moral of the story is that a single loss by the Florida juggernaut this year may be sufficient to derail any hopes at an unprecedented 3rd appearance in 4-years in the BCSG.  The axiomatic (look it up flock) conclusion is that UF, more so than in any year in recent memory, is in need of a strong showing from its opponents.  

Next:  Opening lines and investment opportunities. 

 

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

  Cripes, I just caught wind of this pic over at EDSBS .  The associated commentary is, as usual, witty, so check it out.  SNL won’t devote alot of time to this, and probably couldn’t top the EDSBS “dinosaur/caveman” rant even if significant time were devoted to the topic of Spikes’ errr……new (same old) look.  Suffice it to say that this is a bad man albeit one who eschews the limelight.  Here’s a reminder for those of you with short-memories: 

Like most, SNL is looking forward to Spikes introducing himself to UT’s diva, Bryce Brown in a bout a month or so.

We’ll be picking up the past here at SNL this week, looking at opening lines, commenting on Bowden’s opining that the Charlie Ward was a better college QB than Tebow, and trying to justify Florida’s decision to bring in a 73-point underdog on opening day (tough by any objective measure). 

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

« Older entries § Newer entries »