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UF v. UK: THE BCS AND THE PRESSURE OF NO PRESSURE

October 21, 2008 in ATS, BCS, Gators, LSU, Main Content, SEC, Saban | No comments

 It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.

-FDR

  SNL, catering to the lowest common intellectual denominator, will go ahead and tell you that the image above is an obtuse metaphor for the David v. Goliath matchup that, according to local news outlets and radio shows, is taking place at The Swamp on Saturday.  For the remaining 1% of you, who know nothing of David, Goliath, tanks, or children, SNL offers a sincere look of pity.  Moving on…

The Gator lovefest continues in the wake of Florida’s 55-21 victory over then 3rd-ranked LSU.  Edified by LSU’s victory of South Carolina last Saturday and further imbued with confidence thanks to the incessant cries of Gator supremacy on the local airwaves, Gator fans are fat and happy about now. Reservations in Atlanta and for the most wistful, Miami, are being made daily as the Gator resurgence grows in stature.

Sure, there’s a rankled minority who are incensed that the BCS and its new fangled computers have placed Florida on the fringe of the top-10 (looking up at the Buckeyes), but the silent majority remain corpulent, complacent, and for the time being, are recommending no changes to the Gators coaching staff, play-calling, game-planning, uniforms, facilities, schedule, or logo.  A great relief for Pope Meyer to be sure.

Coming to Gainesville this Sautrday to bask in this contemporary utopia is purported lamb, Kentucky.  Yep, woeful, incompetent, bumbling, undersized and undermanned Kentucky, with its cute little 5-2 record and adorable last second win against Arkansas last week.  The same club that held #2 ‘Bama to 17 points and minus 2 huge plays, around 150 yards rushing. 

Predicted final scores from the flock are somewhere between 52-10 Florida and 41-14 (also Florida) and take SNL back to days of old, when the Gator faithful arrived, like Romans at the Coliseum, for a slaughter of innocents.  Problem is, the “days of old” were only a couple of weeks ago-you remember, when Ole Miss came to The Swamp a 23-point underdog and walked away the victor.

Admittedly, Kentucky lacks any real firepower in its dilapidated state and does not seem to be the “Buster Douglas” that Ole Miss was (and is).  It is the simplicity of this statement that makes the Wildcats dangerous.  Put another way, Kentucky’s apparent lack of playmakers coupled with Florida’s 2-week bath in the post-LSU love bubbles gives rise to a scenario that is difficult for the Gators-the overdog. 

To date, the Gators have shown that they are equally capable of dominating great teams and losing to average teams, but have provided their doubters with no real reason to believe that they are capable of a prolonged campaign of greatness.  Like it or not, in the weeks that follow the inaugural BCS poll, which paradoxically means nothing and everything at this point, there exists an added an element of urgency that wasn’t present when Ole Miss came to Gainesville only a few weeks ago. 

The Gators now know where they stand, which is below Ohio State and USC.  This truth further amplifies the need for the Gators to be sharp, dominant, and overwhelming this weekend against a team that, like Arkansas and Ole Miss, is better than the fans, pundits, and pollsters think.

The reason for this is simple, MOV does not factor into the BCS algorithm, but rankings do.  Florida can expect to move as high as #5 in the Coaches poll if it wins Saturday, but could go as high as #3 if it wins impressively and others lose or win in underwhelming fashion against lesser opponents. 

The distilled sum of the BCS whole rests with Florida’s rise in the polls over the next month, which in turn depends largely on a chorus of high profile pundits extolling Florida’s greatness from their Bristol perch.   The pollsters, like trained seals, will eat from the trough of the E-SPIN highlight buffet and vote the party-line.  If the talking heads parrot Florida as the best 1-loss team at the close of the season, the Gators get to go to Miami. Simple, tidy, and true.

Feel the pressure Gators?  SNL sure hopes so because we’re all counting on you.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: BCS, Gators, Pope Urban, SEC, UK

GATORS: WELCOME TO THE COPACETIC

October 14, 2008 in ACC, ATS, BIG 10, Fans, Gators, LSU, SEC, SEC Fans, The Hat | No comments

  The “Woodstock-esque” outpouring of love continues in Gainesville, much to the chagrin of SNL who no longer partakes in hippie lettuce and indiscriminate acts of coitus with strangers. 

That said Florida’s dominating performance coupled with a bye week will provide some much needed time which SNL will use to dispel the myth that SEC fans suffer from severe myopia by posting on some other topics of interest to CFB fans. 

SNL will also use the time to get off the snide with his bookie, who actually bought SNL a beer last week.  For the neophytes among you, if your bookie is buying you a beer, he likes you-which is bad, very bad.  Still, 2-2 last week with a huge win on Arkansas kept SNL up on the man, but SNL hates beer and will make every effort to ensure that the book pays dearly for its insult. 

In the interim, check out the hops on Janoris!   

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Picture courtesy of The Gainesville Sun

Tags: ATS, DEGENERATES, Gators, Pahokee

LSU’S CHANCES OF “TAKING OUT TEBOW?” SIGNS SAY: NOT LIKELY.

October 8, 2008 in Main Content, SEC, SEC Fans | No comments

  SNL, like every media outlet from “Mike and Mike” to “Pardon the Interruption,” reported yesterday that LSU DT, Ricky Jean-Francois, was quoted as saying that LSU wanted to “take Tebow out” if possible.  Jean-Francois left little wiggle room when he responded to a follow-up question by noting that Tebow “could get medical treatment Sunday” from Florida’s trainers. 

As you might expect, the silver-tongued Jean-Francois has since been called upon to conduct damage control and offered this prepared written statement in hopes of explaining what he meant when uttering yesterday’s illy worded barb:

My comments in regard to Florida quarterback Tim Tebow were misinterpreted and were intended to reflect the style of football that we play at LSU. We have great respect for Tim as a player and a competitor. By taking him out of the game, I meant as a defense we are going to try to make him ineffective. I’m sorry that my initial comments were interpreted another way.”

SNL will ignore the obvious, which is that Jean-Francois-who was suspended last year for..uhhhh…”academic insufficiencies”-clearly did not author the passage above, which reads more like a remiss CEO’s contrived statement of contrition than a forced apology from a 6″3 290 lb. quarterback-seeking cyborg on the eve of a showdown.  However, this is to lose the forest for the trees.

 Any objective football fan (a term used loosely in the context of the SEC), especially one who has spent anytime playing football, knows that this is G-rated stuff which yields little , if any, pragmatic use for either team outside of the standard “bulletin board material” that fans love to regurgitate in the days before a big game.

That said SNL has heard from LSU fans all week, each less eloquent than the last, but  all unified in their belief that LSU’s defensive line is the equivalent of an unstoppable force of nature that will spare only those who kneel before it from total destruction.  SNL, fearing for the women and children caught in the wake if this bellicose group of cajun hellions, was considering relocation until he discovered the following pearl:

LSU is 11th (of 12) in the SEC in sacks per game. Even better, Jean-Francois, utterer of the now infamous threat of bodily injury to Florida’s quixotic leader, Tebow, has one sack through 4 games.  For purposes of comparison, Gator fans may want to know that Florida is 3rd in the SEC with 13 sacks through 5 games.  These are interesting numbers considering that sacking the QB is a perceived strength for LSU, and a perceived weakness for Florida. 

The upshot, Gator fans, is that Florida’s offensive line may lose some battles this Saturday, but will win some too.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: Gators, LSU, SEC, Tebow

LSU v. FLORIDA: GATOR FANS MAKE THE DIFFERENCE?

October 8, 2008 in ATS, Fans, Gators, Main Content, SEC, SEC Fans | No comments

  

As the LSU-Florida showdown nears, the LSU message boards are making it abundantly clear that LSU fully expects to win this game-and, by a fairly significant margin.  

Naturally, there is no statistical significance to the banal banter of fans, nor do fans throw, catch, run, block or tackle come gameday.  However, SNL has long subscribed to the theory that the confidence, complacence, fear, and hubris of a teams fans is often personified by their team with disastrous (or fantastic) results.  

For example, when Florida lost to Ole Miss two weeks ago, the crowd was about as animated as the ostensibly “diverse” group that watched that smooth talking dude debate that  angry old guy on every freaking channel last night. SNL took note of thousands of empty seats before kickoff and (wrongly) assumed that the Gator faithful were “fashionably late.”  By the 2nd quarter, however, it was apparent that Florida fans simply weren’t that excited about playing a 23-point underdog and had instead opted to stay home and nurse their hangovers.

Keeping with SNL’s theory, the malaise of the Gator allegiant had spread like STD’s at a fraternity house and ultimately, manifested itself in the players, who were clearly less than amped before kickoff-which is why the E-SPIN heads will hawk their weekly CFB promo at the Cotton Bowl this week instead of The Swamp. 

Applying this theory to the upcoming SEC showdown, and particularly, the overconfident Tigers of the LSU variety, gives rise to a situation that has been much more favorable to The Gators in recent years;  the role of the underdog.  Naturally, the rigid contingent of fans who worship at the Vegas altar will run to the safety of the current spread, which is Gators by 4-5, to undermine this assertion.  For those who fall into this category, SNL weeps for your lack of understanding.

The fact is that the Gator chatboards, talkshows, and even national media have embarked on a furious “What’s wrong with Florida?” campaign (see SNL’s previous post for more on this).  This engine of discontent has been oiled by Gator fans with disastrous effect ( See Tebow’s stoic reaction after throwing a perfect strike to Harvin last week in last week’s “disgraceful” 38-7 road win as Exhibit “A.”)

Irrespective of the origins, the Gators have found themselves to be underdogs in the eye of the public and more importantly, in the eyes of both Gator and LSU fans.  Therefore, if SNL’s theory holds true, LSU’s players are expecting little adversity on Saturday-the defense will dominate the line of scrimmage and Chuck “The Truck” will run through gaping holes torn in the Baby Gators weak defensive front.

Florida players, conversely, have suffered a shocking loss and heard for weeks now how bad they are. The restless Gator-backers have piled on by openly grousing about the offense’s inability to be perfect and the defense’s seeming lack of progress. 

The predictable result is that the Gators, and their fans, have their backs against the wall.  This in turn means that unlike the poorly prepared and cathartic group of Gators that showed up two weeks ago, The Swamp this Saturday will be the home of a focused, angry, scared, and determined Gator Nation. 

The result, 23-19 Florida, of course. 

But make no mistake Gator fans, there exists a real need to diametrically alter your general tenor, which is eerily similar to the end of Spurrier’s reign, when winning by too little was grounds to attack the OBC and losing was unacceptable.  The current spate of negativity surrounding the Gators should work in our favor this week, but in the long run it will run off coaches, dissuade recruits and make Gator football a “chore” instead of a treat.  Govern yourselves accordingly.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tags: Gators, LSU, SEC, Tebow, Urban

LSU v. FLORIDA: TRASH TALK TUESDAY

October 7, 2008 in Fans, Gators, Main Content, SEC, SEC Fans, UGA | No comments

  SNL awoke today to find the grass greener, the sky “bluer,” and air fresher.  Why?  Because we are one day closer to the Florida v. LSU.  As if this simple truth was insufficient, LSU DE, Ricky Jean-Francois, provided a nice jolt (for a Tuesday) when he was quoted in the Daily Reveille as stating that he wouldn’t mind hurting Florida’s quixotix QB, Tebow.  Here’s the article:  

The LSU defensive line’s opening shot at the 2007 Heisman winner could resemble “a car wreck without a seat belt,” LSU junior defensive tackle Ricky Jean-Francois told The Orlando Sentinel.SNL, for one, thinks this quote is great news and thanks the dallying Frenchmen who decided to insert himself (figuratively perverts) into the bloodline that ultimately spawned Jean-Francois. 

“If we get a good shot on [Tebow], we’re going to try our best to take him out of the game,” Jean-Francois said. “With his size and his heart, it’s hard to get a clean shot.”

Tebow can rely on Florida’s trainers to help him if the Tigers do injure him, Jean-Francois added.

“If he does get hurt, there’s a trained medical staff at Florida, so you can go to the training room on Sunday,” Jean-Francois said.

The 6-foot-3-inch, 289-pound defensive tackle said his sentiment was not out of the ordinary.

“I think every lineman wants to get a good hit on a Heisman Trophy winner,” he said.

 

Moving on…

LSU plays Florida, ‘Bama and Georgia over the next three weeks-brutal. 

LSU’s RB, Chuck “The Truck” Scott has rushed for over 100 yards in each game this season.  He’s a beast and LSU’s offensive line, which includes 6′7 389 lb. guard, Herman Johnson, should be problematic.  This is a game in which Spikes must show up big time as Florida will need double-digit tackles from the Mike position to have any success on defense.  SNL expects to see alot of man-coverage on 1st-down and remains guardedly optimistic that Haden, who is improving weekly, will be able to lock down one side of the field.  In obvious passing situations we can expect a fairly heavy dose of the zone blitz given the fron-4’s inability to wreak havoc on their own.  More about this later… 

For now, suffice it to say that the importance of this game will continue to grow as the week wears on and Gator backers can expect the E-SPIN heads and the national pundits to pile on the LSU bandwagon as kickoff nears.  Never doubt, however, that the talent, coaching, and chemistry necessary to slay the Tigers of the LSU variety is present on this Gator team and that which need be done, will be done.

-So Sayeth the Shepherd

Tags: Gators, LSU, Miles, SEC, Urban

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